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The Premier League is back, what a day!
“…and joining me on commentary duty is Martin Keown”



🎙 Messi: “I told the club I wanted to leave, then I saw the number of ‘can Messi do it on a cold night in Stoke?’ tweets and thought, nah, I’ll stay.
“Plus, now I get a 65m loyalty bonus. So f*ck it. I’ll get to the Arndale Centre Greggs next year.”

Floyd Mayweather: “James DeGale is the best fighter in the UK.”
Do you agree?

Leicester have turned down a £70m bid from Man United for Harry Maguire.
It seems a lot for him, but not when you take into account his magnificent, indestructible head, which was designed by Cyberdyne Systems and features living, breathing tissue over a hyperalloy endoskeleton.
#mufc #harrymaguire #leicester #terminator #head #paddypower
60mil for him and 10mil for the circumference and transport of his head

Harry Maguire is one of the true success stories of this World Cup.
We’ve said it before, but it’s worth remembering that he looks a bit like one of those background characters in Harry Potter that doesn’t have any lines, but laughs at everything Malfoy says. #worldcup #harrymaguire #harrypotter #dumbledork #itscominghome #paddypower

Manchester United have reportedly agreed an £85m fee with Leicester City for Harry Maguire.
Leicester may not be able to spend the money right away, though, with Scotland Yard keen to investigate them for daylight f*cking robbery.
#mufc #leicester #harrymaguire #hogwarts #malfoysmate #scotlandyard #paddypower #tgif

Man Utd: We refuse to be held to ransom in the transfer market.
Sporting Lisbon:
