


Joachim Low has reportedly issued a sex ban to his German players during the World Cup. Scratching your bollocks in public and then sniffing your fingers is being widely encouraged, however.


Paddy PowerVerified account @paddypower 23 minutes ago
“Liz? What the f*** is going on?” #RoyalWedding

Carlos Carvalhal has left Swansea. In a brief, but poignant statement, he explained his decision: “F*ck that.”

BREAKING: Paul Lambert has left Stoke, after realising they’re f*cking Stoke.


Paddy PowerVerified account @paddypower 19 hours ago
The only thing to make this afternoon of cricket even sweeter would be a cool refreshing pint of Gibney’s. Mmmmmmm, Gibney’s. Just like my Mother used to make it.