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With our brand new Beat The Drop game, we’re giving all customers £1 million quid! Then you answer some questions to keep it. Not bad. But you’ll never be Emmanuel Petit. Find out more: http://pdy.pr/n2ezsY

Paddy PowerVerified account @paddypower 23 minutes ago
“Liz? What the f*** is going on?” #RoyalWedding

Tiger Woods had 5 drugs in his system when he was arrested. We all know what they were. Bifters. He had 5 bifters in a row. Mad bastard.


Joachim Low has reportedly issued a sex ban to his German players during the World Cup. Scratching your bollocks in public and then sniffing your fingers is being widely encouraged, however.


Paddy PowerVerified account @paddypower 23 minutes ago
“Liz? What the f*** is going on?” #RoyalWedding

Carlos Carvalhal has left Swansea. In a brief, but poignant statement, he explained his decision: “F*ck that.”